I almost forgot......

Last fall I decided it would be best for Noah that he wouldn't attend school. At the time it was the best decision for him. Towards the end of November I noticed that he was starting to be very distant and unhappy. I also was feeling very trapped and depressed.

I soon realized that Noah needed to get out of the house and be around other people. I love Noah dearly but, I too was needed a break from him. I made some phone calls to find out what our options were. Scott and I went and visited a classroom at our local middle school. (Noah's age group)
It was a mainstream multi-handicap classroom. We instantly fell in love. What a awesome stress free environment. You could feel the difference as soon as you walked in the door. By the first full week in December Noah was attending school M-F form 8:30-12:30.

Noah loves it!!!!! I even see a difference in him at home. So much happier and healthier. I know I can't change the past.... but, looking back on the last 7 years I wish I had done something sooner.
Seeing the difference in him at school and home makes me upset with myself. Why didn't I protect my baby when I should have? I guess at the time I was doing what I thought was best for my child. Never realizing at the time what it was really doing to him. At the time I thought it could be all the germs in the classroom that was making him sick. Now I know it was him being very stressed out and making himself sick.

I was visting one of my blogs that I read and the post I was reading was exactly the way I connect with Noah.
What she says is so true. I changed it a bit:Having a nonverbal child can be challenging. Noah is not good at telling me what is making him stressed out or sad. Often when Noah needs something or is upset about something. I can quiet my mind and focus in on what is bothering him. I'll get a vision in my mind, a feeling in my heart and words make their way into my head and I begin to understand what it is that is bothering Noah. I just need to learn to listen and believe in my Mommy intuition more often.Noah's teachers are wonderful with him. I can honestly say that Noah has wormed his way into their hearts. I can see that they love him so much. I thank them for taking the time in getting to Noah so quickly. He is so happy going to school and I'm enjoying my time learning what it is to be me.