Has it really been 5 years?

Five year ago today we had to say goodbye to a very sweet gentle man with the biggest heart. A day doesn't go by that we don't think about him. He will be forever missed by his family and friends. I will never forget how Noah reacted that morning. That one small tear right before his Grandpa went to Heaven. I know his Grandpa spoke to him and let him know he was going to be ok. He always told our girls that as long as they did their best no matter what the outcome, he would always be proud of them.
This is a paper Morgan wrote about her Grandpa:

Singing Makes Me Think of You

"Do you people realize that tomorrow is State Contest?" asked Mr. Nabors. "You are messing around and you call yourself the top choir?"
Just then the back door of the Little Theater opened and in walked Blake Ridenour and my mom. He points at me and beckons me to him. I was so afraid to get up as Mr. Nabors continued on in his fit of rage. I put my index finger up to tell my mom that I would be there in a little bit. A look of frustration filled her face and she mouths the word, "Now."
My heart dropped to the floor. All I was thinking was, "What is wrong now? Did I do something wrong? Is Noah okay?" And that is when it hit me, Grandpa. I almost started crying right then. I slowly stood up so I could make my way to the back door. As I reached the door my mom stepped out, but as soon as I saw her, I knew that she had been crying. "What?" I asked. I kept repeating until she answered.
" I just came from Galion," she said hesitantly. " Your Grandpa just passed away."
I burst into tears and buried my head in my mom’s chest. I cried until my stomach hurt. I kept thinking about the things he would never be there to see. After a little while all I wanted was to go home. Rachael Roth had seen the whole scene from inside the office. She came out after a while and asked, "Do you want me to help you get your books?"
I nodded and we started the hardest walk of my life. No matter where I went my classmates would be there. As we walked through the cafeteria so many were staring at my red, blotchy eyes. I hung my head thinking that no one would notice until we made it to the safety of the locker room. I gathered my things and Rachael and I gave each other a big hug.
Then something popped in my mind, State Contest. I had completely forgotten in a matter of five or ten minutes. I knew I wouldn’t make it through the performance. I had to tell Mr. Nabors.
My mom and I waited in the music hallway until the bell rang. I slowly opened the door. Mr. Nabors saw my face and said, "Hey, little one, are you okay?"
I walked to the table where I had eaten lunch earlier that day. I started to say what happened but then broke down crying. All of my friends and Mrs. Kunz ran to my side and gave me a big hug. They had known everything that had been going on. This group of people had helped me through Grandpa’s sickness and were ready to help me deal with his death. My mom proceeded to explain the situation and that I didn’t want to go to contest the next day. Mr. Nabors understood and told me to go home to be with family.
We left the school and went to tell my sister. After this my mom drove us to my grandma’s house.
As we arrived at Grandma’s house, so many memories flooded my mind. Grandpa taught us how to fish in his pond and hit golf balls in his yard. I didn’t even make it in the door without crying. My grandma was there to offer big hugs. As people saw us kids crying they began to cry again as well. Many ‘I love you’s’ and ‘He’s in a better place’ were said, but in the back of my mind was state contest.
We had been preparing for a very long time, and I didn’t want all of that to go down the tubes.
My dad had asked what I was going to do. "Mrs. Baker told me to think about it and make my decision tomorrow."
Through all of this, my grandma had been keeping herself busy by cleaning and yet had been listening the whole time. " You know, Morgan," she said quietly.
"Yeah?" I questioned.
" Your grandpa loved to hear you sing. In fact he loved everything you did. He would want you to go tomorrow."
"Thanks, Grandma," I said as my eyes filled with tears. " I know he loved what we did but it won’t be right."
"Sing for your grandpa and it will be right because he will be there," said my grandma.
After thinking for a little bit, I made my decision. I would go to State Contest.
The next day I traveled to Columbus with the choir. We sang our hearts out and earned a superior rating. The first person I called was my grandma. If it wasn’t for her I wouldn’t have gone or sung for Grandpa.
Because of that day, I will always sing for Grandpa. He will be there for me every time and he is my biggest fan.
We love you and miss you,

What every special needs child should come with.

 I often think about what a special needs child should come with.  Parker's Mom Recently wrote a blog about it.
 It's been 15yrs since I've been part of the special needs club. It's been a long hard road at times. It's been very stressful and overwhelming but, I wouldn't trade anything. I love being Noah's Mom. He is such a blessing and has taught me many things.
  What every special needs child should come with:
1. A Angel
For the days when you are too exhausted and overwhelmed to even know what to pray for, how fantastic would it be to simply look over at your Angel and without a word uttered be able to share your heart and know that your Angel will be on their way to plead in your behalf until you are able to think straight again.

2. A Maid
 When you get the news that your child has Trisomy 8 and cp (or any other diagnosis)there should be a light tap at you door and in should walk your new maid.  Because  you are about to be bombarded with more information than one brain can possibly hold, knowing that your home will be clean and dinners on the table would go far in allowing you to focus on being a good Mom and wife. I get so overwhelmed with everything that needs to be done I tend to do nothing and then I feel guilty which me makes me more overwhelmed.


3.A Medical Bank Account
Notice I didn’t type ‘suddenly become a millionaire’ or something like that. It’s not about being able to go out and buy the latest bling.    I’m talking about a bank account that can only be accessed  after your insurance company turns you down for the zillionth time for something your kid needs to keep him safe while sleeping, or even something that would increase the quality of your kid’s life by getting him out in his world easier.  I believe there is a huge relationship between the mind and body.

4. Good Neighbors and Friends
 We have been so blessed to have the best community to live and raise Noah in. Having a special needs child tends to feel like you are alone in the world, having friends and family that support you have helped tremendously. Thank you from the bottom of hearts. We  feel so loved.

5.Prayers
 When people offer up prayers in our behalf we can actually feel them.  Prayers for peace.  Prayers for the doctors to have the wisdom to know what best to do to keep Noah healthy.  Prayers to banish the fear.  Prayers to ask for us to be able to hear the whisperings of the Still Small Voice.   The value of a heart felt prayer, uttered with true faith and desire is priceless.

Because, a post without a picture of Noah would just be wrong:

Noah has been feeling great. He rebounded from his last "attack" and enjoying the sunshine.

A Trip to the Zoo

Last weekend we went to the Columbus zoo.

It was a chilly , sunny day.

The polar bears were out roaming and enjoying the sunshine.

We saw a cute little prairie dog family.

I asked Noah if he could see and hear all the animals.

(His first time with hearing aides and glasses)

He excitedly said, "Yes"

In the afternoon it warmed up more and the zoo started to get a lot more busy. We decided to call it a day and come back another day since we have a year membership.

Happy 24th Anniversary, Scott

I would like to wish my husband a Happy 24th Anniversary. We've had our up and downs but, I'm so glad we have stuck by each other through it all.

I love you, Scott!!!! 

It's Getting Harder and Harder

 I remember when Noah got his first wheel chair. He was 3 years old and weighed only 18lbs. He looked so tiny in his 75lb chair. Even back then I remembered dreading going out and about and having to lift his chair in and out of the van every time we wanted to make a stop somewhere.

 Over the years it has gotten harder and harder as he has grown. I would love to have a van with a lift. It would help in taking Noah out to explore his world so much easier.

A simple trip to the store takes picking Noah and his chair up 6 times. That's only if you need to go to one store. Sometimes its just easier to stay home and I HATE THAT!!!!

Noah deserves better than that.